Blonde Joke

[Crow[Buu]]

ok there was a redhead, a burnette, and a blonde. They all went to a hotel. The hotel manager says we only have one room left but theres a mirror in it and if you tell the truth to the mirror it will grant you one wish, however if you lie to the mirror it will suck you in for all eternity. The girls say "Well take it." The redhead goes to the mirror and says "I think I'm the smartest girl in this room, and if I'm telling the truth then I want a million dollars." All of a sudden the phone rings and its her bank she just recieved a million dollars so she goes off happy. The burnette goes to the mirror and says "I think I'm the most beautiful girl in this room, and if I'm telling the truth then i want a corvette and Tom Cruise." All of a sudden she hears a car horn beap. She goes to the window and its Tom Cruise in a brand new corvette, so she drives off happy. Then the blonde walks up to the mirror and says "I think" AND THEN SHE WAS SUCKED INTO THE MIRROR FOR ALL ETERNITY..........................Dun Dun Dun!!!

[Knuk[buu]]

damn thats pretty funny

[Wolf]

thas a good 1 i never heard it b4

[Wolf]

A blonde cop stops a blonde motorist and asks for her driving license.

The Motorist scuffles around in her purse but can't find it. She says to the cop, "I must have left it at home, officer."

The cop says, "Well, do you have any kind of identification?" The motorist scuffles around in her purse again, and finds a pocket mirror.

She looks at it and says to the cop, "All I have is this picture of myself." The cop says, "Let me see it, then." So the blonde motorist gives the mirror to the blonde cop, who looks at it, and replies, "Well, if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have even pulled you over. You can go now."

[Wolf]

A blonde decided she needed something new and different for a winter hobby. She went to the bookstore and bought every book she could find on ice fishing.

For weeks she read and studied, hoping to become an expert in the field. Finally she decided she knew enough and out she went for her first ice fishing trip. She carefully gathered up and packed all the tools and equipment needed for the excursion. Each piece of equipment had its own special place in her kit.

When she got to the ice, she found a quiet little area, placed her padded stool and carefully laid out her tools.

Just as she was about to make her first cut into the ice, a booming voice from the sky bellowed, "There are no fish under the ice!!"

Startled, the blonde grabbed up all her belongings, moved further along the ice, poured some hot chocolate from her thermos, and started to cut a new hole.

Again the voice from above bellowed, "There are no fish under the ice!!"

Amazed, the blonde was not quite sure what to do as this certainly was not covered in any of her books. She packed up her gear and moved to the far side of the ice. Once there, she stopped for a few moments to regain her calm. Then she was extremely careful to set everything up perfectly--tools in the right place, chair positioned just so. Just as she was about to cut this new hole, the voice came again.

"There are no fish under the ice!!"

Petrified, the blonde looked skyward and asked, "Is that You, Lord?"

The voice boomed back, "NO THIS IS THE MANAGER OF THE SKATING RINK!"

[Wolf]

Every Blonde's Year:

January - Took a new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!

March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.

September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!

December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!